Winter Wonderland---NOT part deux

I like writing "Deux" cause it makes me seem smarter than I am. You know..Like I have class and taste and am living way above my means! BUT REALLY...I did recently drink that Domaine Du Pegau 1989 remember???

So WHY is it, that we who live in the frozen vast north can't apply for disaster relief every damn winter?
HELLO.!!! There is. 12. inches. in my driveway--and its not Diesels (http://www.mattresspolice.com), or any other hot male.
It IS however White, not that I'm a racist. I hate it when people say that. You know they are then. Racist.
OR
" You can trust me". Yah Right. Sooner trust a stoner with my bag of weed.
IF I HAD a bag of weed! I'm just SAYIN! Sheesh. No need to go rootin through my undies drawer. I DO NOT have a bag of a weed.
What I do have, is 12 inches of white cold shit in my driveway that I have to PAY somebody else to come and plow around. It does not give pleasure. Does NOT vibrate, and does NOT lead to more sleep.
As as far as anything vibrating..NO there is not one of those in my undies drawer either.
Step AWAY from the drawer.
No seriously.....STEP AWAY.