Sunday, April 29, 2007

Jane Doe no more....

A sexual assault survivor "came out" recently. After my car wreck in which I was incredibly mangled I made it a point to NOT learn the perps name that did this to me. I wanted him , NEEDED him to be faceless...for ME...not for him.I did not want his name burned into my memory for my lifetime... :

Jane Doe No More Incorporated (JDNM) is borne out of hits ladies' experience as a victim of sexual assault. Crime is an unfortunate reality in today's society and I was unprepared for what lay ahead after the attack as, I believe, is the case with most victims. I was mistreated by the very system put in place to "protect and serve" the innocent. On top of the pain and suffering associated with the crime, the abuse afterward rendered the healing process all the more difficult. The name and the anonymity are meant to protect, as a sort of verbal shield. But sometimes it's necessary to put down a shield to fight a battle. At least, that was the case for one woman we met. She was a woman ready to reclaim her identity. To be Jane Doe No More. A woman named Donna Palomba a GREAT read.

I I sometimes do...relating these types of things to my own spirituality.

PLATE STEALER NO MORE. No longer will I tuck plates from restruants as memories in my purse...or will I.
God more...hopefully LEARN that still small voice is for ME and To LISTEN UP RIGHT NOW!!!
MOM SCREAMER NO MORE. Oh man..that would be so much more peaceful.
Kid SHUT UPPER no more.
Embittered former worker NO MORE. Reluctant waiter on God's working NO MORE.BAD photo taker NO MORE. Lusting for Physical more. Well...that one is still there. I crave touch.

Death and Reunion's

So a "shirt tail" relative died last week. My sister decided to fly in from Seattle, with a lot of help from her dad who paid for the ticket. I had a NASTY night sleep Friday night, Didn't get to sleep until 4. Then Get a call from sister she is flying into Detroit at FIVE a.m., was "planning on taking the bus, then a taxi"..yah yah right.
SO..Debate for me I sleep until 2, get up and drive to airport..or leave at 10:30, and snooze once I got there? I left at down to Detroit. Got lost, twice. Car overheated 3x. IN NASTY neighborhoods.
Finally Got her, no thanks to NOT KNOWING the airlines she was coming in on.

No sleep all week. My brother who has not been in Michigan in over 27 years came. it was Great seeing him. In the middle of all this was funeral.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

D.C. and Tae quon Do

What a day. Woke up of course with BAD hair..this cut gives me nothing but trouble until it is sprayed down.
Was talking IM with a buddy who actually Said EEEEKKKK when viewing my hair. That's bad.
Started with a crying jag for some reason..COULD not stop. Cried my contact lens out. Had an extra kid here...tryin got get ready for a bake sale fund raiser for Golumbisky's tae quon do.
My Girlfriend Shelly came over yesterday and we baked and baked...She called Hub "honey" ...Made his day..don't tell Lori!!We made: carrot cake, choc muffins, Corn muffins, vanilla muffins, choc dipped pretzels, choc dipped almond cookies, STIFF jello..whatever its called, bags of carrots, bags of licorice, boiled eggs, chock chip cookies, no bakes and I know I'm missing something. The sale..was abysmal. I also took like 60 waters to sell.
Continued crying some prescriptions as I was OUT and leaving tomorrow for DC. I so don't feel like going.
I DID find my ID tho..thank you God for Clear direction in that I SHOULD go.
Went out to a local eatery tonight and a radio station was there, and somehow I ended up doing a "Treasure Hunt" with in the place for various items you were to get from other customers. When asked my name ...I stated LOUDLY and PROUDLY.."LORI SMITH FROM ITHACA"....LOL. If you want to know what started out innocently..a comb, a watch, a sort of beyond.
I saw I guy I thought may be a friend's Son..that is Dave..I haven't met him yet..and asked was this person he..(hub said he looks exactly like the other brothers) He wasn't my friend's son, but KNEW them all..and we had a very nice discussion. He was involved in bible work as is my friends son Josh, and so I was able to catch him up a little. He used to be a professional in line skater..but got really messed up ..broke his wrist, young on the circuit and Drugs and alcohol became huge problems..he just got out of rehab and I was able to talk to him quite a bit.He had been engaged to a "Nice Christian virgin" girl...who knew NOTHING of his addcitions to cocaine, herion, and OXY. He ended breaking it off...and I'm sooo Happy for the girl. He said she probably doesn't know yet..but it was a lesson for me...that the worst things we may think of..a broken engagement are saving us from untold heartbreak.
I"m leaving tomorrow for D.C. With the Children's Defense Fund. I don't feel at all prepared...but if I don't would just be worse...I'm frustrated. Good Networking tho..I will just have to make it work for me.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

I feel Paralyzed

I'm so sick as I write this I'm surprzed I can write. My GUT MY GUT MY GUT IS ON FIRE...sung to the Tune of "The roof is on fire". I didn't know about ICE CREAM.
I think I should go to ER. I can't breathe...I took some antacids...Its not working..I can't burp enough....the PAIN IS SO BAD.
Stress on Stress i'm sure...
Dear god please give me a break.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

My "JASPER" findings

I"m a MENTOR, Empowering, Expressive, Communication, and independent

JASPER - The Job Asset and Strengths Profiler

Donna, your answers indicate that you are aMentor when it comes to your overall work personality. Your JASPER type is a combination of your most prominent work traits and a good indicator of what you're like at work.

"It's easy to make a buck. It's a lot tougher to make a difference."
-Tom Brokaw

JASPER THIS IS ME (or so they say)
April 2007


unique strengths



communication skillscommunication


What you want out of work:
To foster your own growth and instill inspiration and drive in those around you.

Your colleagues think of you as:
Instructive, encouraging, and patient.

What you have to offer:
A talent and desire to be a positive guiding force and an ability to use your skills to teach others.

leadership styleempowering
Empowering. Your leadership style can be characterized as Empowering. You are encouraging and motivating, which likely means that you help others reach their goals and dreams. People probably see you as a good mentor due to your patience and talent for giving direction.
work personalityexpressive
Expressive.You are more Expressive than Introspective when it comes to your work personality. You have an energetic aura about you and are quite gregarious and outgoing. At work, you draw energy and motivation from social interactions and relationships with others.

Univeral Skillsverbal skills
Communication skills. You likely are an articulate person, and you probably have received positive feedback on your writing ability or your skill speaking to groups. Even if you don't regularly use this skill, you nevertheless have confidence in your communication abilities.

Independent. You show strength in your ability to be an Independent worker. While you no doubt can be quite effective working on a team, you feel much more productive when you have the freedom to do things on your own. You simply enjoy the autonomy that independent work entails.

It's Snowing

So here it is Spring break and it is snowing. The robin's are pissed off. They keep flying into the barn and hanging out.
I want to torch the 'burn pile' but there are so many animals hanging out in there, they'd be homeless.
I don't know what we'll do when we get our five chickens.

I know this is a crappy post, but I'm trying to just get started again.
the demons that have been chasing Me I am ignoring, and trying to trust.