Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Life's Been Good to Me So Far

Lucky I'm sane after all Ive been through
Everybody says Im cool (shes cool)
I cant complain but sometimes I still do
Lifes been good to me so far

..................Joe Walsh

Well, that is assuming that I AM sane. Some dayz...Today was frustrating on any number of levels. I get out from a meeting, there is a note on my windshield from a co worker, "nailing" me for something. On my freekin WINDSHIELD. So I wasn't planning on going back to office, then I had too.

I did get my nails done...there was an Office "Mary Kay" party at noon. I love having my nails polished..I"m not a very "good" girl...and great lipstick and fingernail polish seems a luxury, but I'm beginning to think of it a lot differently.
It makes ME feel sooo much better, then I am more put together in my thoughts. The girls and I each did each others nails a few weeks was a blast..and SOOO "Girly". My GF has boys, and she has helped me see the pleasure of having girls.

I am getting sick of being disorganized. I am making great progress thought. Gutted off part of computer table tonight, after walking Bugsy.

Bugsy..what a dog. She cracks me up. She is getting more and more protective of me which endears her more to me. Someone rang the doorbell, and She went NUTS...barking and letting me know of the intruder. LOL. She has doggy school tomorrow night. JOY keeps asking Bugsy..."did you do your homework bugsy???"..She of all the kids has attached more to Bugsy than the older 2. Maybe its the "pecking order" thing as a buddy said.

WEll..I have tons more to say..but don't feel like writing.
I have been reading Esther..and how she used her femininity toward good, in leading her husband to be rightous. She was desirable, and a good leader. That's what I want to be. All the leadership books/mentors can't teach you some things. It has to come from within.

I had Lunch yesterday with my friend who is an Attorney / Business owner. Went to East Lansing, and had great Creme' Brulee for Dessert. I kept thinking about taking my mostly non drinking girlfriend there and getting her 'feeling' good when her hubby was out of state. I also went there with my sister. And had lunch there with my girls. The Memories were flying all over the place. Of course..the Wine and Irish whiskey didn't hurt any. I went to the bookstore next door after wards and read for a couple hours. It was great. HUGE fireplace..slight buzz, free great books. Everything was right in my world.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Living in the Smudges

I read this on someone's blog. "We live in the smudges". How apt is that. When I was little..everything was so nice and neat..Very black and white. What mom said GOES, we had to leave a note WHereever we went, who we were going with, phone numbers( This was before cell phones were even THOUGHT of)--black telephones with DIAL numbers. And She ALWAYS called to check up and see if we were where we said we would be.

Then in my teen years, with a very active Youth group, I was spared from very much teenage grief. Didn't get into drinking alcohol(First alcohol I ever drank was after my divorce when I was 25). Well..I DID go to the school dances...oh man I was ever looked down at for that. Thank god for the people that provided stuff for us at Church..we always had football game parties after the home games...they took us on College tours, Cedar Point, New York, all over.

ANYWAYS..back to the SMUDGES part...In teen years..I began to make my own choices, and the Black and white part started to smudge a little. I never did "give it up" to anyone (thank God for that..I couldn't IMAGINE telling my mom as a teen that I was knocked up). I was literally SCARED STIFF of not having sex!! Bible College..the stuff "right and wrong" was literally shoved down my throat...I was too much of a free thinker to be a good Bible College least at THAT college. While I was at a "worldly" College, CMU, I did just fine. I hooked up with some GOOD Christians, REAL ones, with different thinking patterns, and more of a real relationship with Christ then I had. They actually had DISCUSSION groups!! Go Figure! Closed minded Christians piss me off.

Then..after life events took me away from the organized church for about 10 years..I fell into a right wing nut jobs church. Some call it Spiritual abuse.
How nice for some to be able to be dictated to, not have to think between the lines...all that.
I'm really don't TRY to be a rebel...I just want to "be all I can be". My life is filled with smudges...there is very little that is black and white.
I don't really know if it is better or not. I'm certainly not feeling like I'm any closer to God because of it.
Maybe its a good thing I always have liked the color gray.

summer movies

Joy had a birthday party in Mt.Pleasant yesterday from 2-5. It was a 'reunion" Luau birthday theme. The kind of mom you love to hate. Hand made birthday cards with raffia to hold them closed, Luau pinata, Blow up Pool, sprinkler, blow up palm trees, Cabana over the pool and table area, game bags with toys-candy for all guests. Just Sick. lol.

SO I had to kill some time in Mt. Pleasant. The Mt Pleasant SUmmer fest was going on at Island Park but I rarely get alone time, and just did Not feel like being around people, making nice, and not having much cash either dampens my spirit when around all kinds of stuff. ANYWAY...

have been wanting to see "THE LAKE HOUSE". Sandra Bullock, Keanu Reeves. Some reason, Time travel movies ALWAYS get me. "Somewhere in Time" (I hear some of you groaning), Back to the Future, and a New Favorite of several Months ago..."FREQUENCY"--Where a father and son duo, talk to each other thirty years apart Via Ham Radio. Yah it was farfetched, but I can jump in and believe these premisis for the sake of entertainment. The Son and Dad are able to solve a crime, and the son is able to protect his dad. It was a great flick. Now to THE LAKE HOUSE. yes-Corny. I don't care. I'm glad no one was with me to spoil it by groaning, or worse, trying to point out inconsistencies. JUST WATCH AND BELIVE. Had some moments..when Sandra was waiting in a swanky restruant for a 2 year old reservation, and the guy is a no show-everyone is disappointed, but of course there is a Reason. The reason is told later in the movie, and you can forgive the jerk for standing her up.
Also has some decent shots of Chicago which Is one of my favorite cities.
RECCOMEND? Yes, If you can suspend stedfast rules for a while.

MUNICH: Wow...I"m in the middle of watching this a second time. One quote I love is
from one of the Jewish hit men Robert: "We are supposed to be righteous. That's a beautiful thing. And we're losing it. If I lose that, that's everything. That's my soul." and also.."There is no Peace at the end of this". I frequently think or say, "NO GOOD CAN COME OF THIS" regarding a poor choice I am making or someone I know is making. reminds me of the WAR song: "WAR UGH>>>WHAT IS IT GOOD FOR ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN".
I find the movie difficult to follow, could be our crappy tv speakers, and the subtitles in part are TOO TINY. Come on Steve (Mr Spielberg lets me call him that)...Increase the FONT SIZE!!
TOPIC CHANGE: got some nice cute short skirts that are tight across my ass...(thanks to my friend Lori who I am taking fashion cues from). THEN noted that the Panty lines really are distracting..sooooo...Bought my first Thong undies. hee hee. I feel like such a GIRL. I do have nice ass etts, and decent legs!! Throw in Decent ample cleavage..and SOMEBODY should want me...but ..nobody does.
Except the dog. and she doesn't have much discretion.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

A Wise Woman Builds

The Entire verse is "the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands". Prov 14:1

I guess I just like the first part.." A Wise Woman Builds". Builds HER. Builds.
Doesn't tear down.
It is more difficult to build than to tear down. It's harder to be nice than to be neutral or be mean.

Sometimes Women are just plain dumb. Its hard to keep your mouth shut. Its difficult not to complain. The grass is always greener. Someone else has cuter kids (WAIT WHAT AM I SAYING??)) Ok not that one.
but THEIR kids are dressed better.
We need to band together as women, to hold each other accountable for wrong thinking, for being a brat and encourage one another to be true to thier own life.

Strawberry Dayz

Sort of a lazy summer day yesterday, I was feeling kind of Punkish, dropped JOy off for a couple hours so I could go into work.
Realized I have GOT to get my date book out and get writing stuff down I'm getting triple booked and that's just not good. So much for "not taking anything on I dont have to" syndrome.
IT POURED last night..I hope its ok up at camp for dd age 9. I did send a plastic hooded rain gear thing. I think we forgot the umbrella.
Anyways, I got home yesterday, laid down with a new Psych today magazine (YEAHHH--its such "easy' reading...and fell into a doze. Lori Smith called wanting me to take her boys so she could go to MT P shopping. They always play well together.WIlliam LOVES being the "big brother" to them, they did video's computer one Time I think I heard Foamy the squirrel and just reminded him to be appropriate. LOL. Foamy....what a nasty little guy!!
SO I was dozing..heard the doorbell, figured it was kids...kept dozing...finally got the dog, walked into the kitchen..and there AWWCKKKK was our accountant sitting at the table cleaning Strawberry's. YIKES. VERY weird feeling. THen He said he saw me snoozing and didn't say anything...DOUBLE YIKES YIKES. Anyway (man it is just STORMING OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW). Well he also brought 3 pounds of ground round and some ice cream, so we finished cleaning the berries, I made sloppy joe and corn and made shortcake with my secret ingredient in the dough (ask me I'll tell you and you will NEVER make them without it again!!).
Don got the "squirt" whipping cream as the store was Out of "real" whipping cream (gotta love Gratiot County).
Dinner was fabulous, Lori came to get the boys and we sat out on the deck for a good long while on a hot summer night. Relaxing. Watching thekids play, dinner on the fed, glass of wine around..(accountant drinking strawberry margarita cooler-- and says he doesn't know why he's feeling SOOO RELAXED). Well...Thats why I like wine. Takes the edge off of my pain.
Had William clean up (yahhhh behavior agreement!!!!), watched HOUSE , one i'd never seen before (who knew the Blonde had been married and her husband DIED??)
THEN went to bed early, am up early and feeling ook . Enjoying the morning quiet, coffee here, rain and thunder. Oh yah. Life is good this moment anyway.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Father's Day

Father's Day. The kids have been celebrating with Don for a couple of weeks. We got him presents from all over. ..Shirt's from Old Navy, shorts, Can't remember what else. Then today..sweet joy..wraps up a couple things she had, a yo-yo, and a Duck book. How sweet is that.
So we made Johnsonville Brats, Fruit Salad, Potato Salad, and Helena made Deviled eggs.
Then..we let him take a nap when he got home, and I have brownies in the oven right now. William talked me into putting nuts and chocolate chips in they will be GOOEY. Bugsy, the laying on the kitchen floor waiting for her time to nail the cat Lucky Simon.

Father's. Wierd. Never really had one. I did the typical absent father in the family thing too, first time around..married an oppressive, overbearing jerk, who thought leading was whipping into submission. Unlike our Heavenly Father, who leads gently, kindly and lovingly with patience.

Ran into one of my "dad's" at the Maple Syrup Festival when I had a booth there for Foster Care. Jim Harner. Nicest guy. Married a 29 year old twice divorced woman with five kids, when he was 23. "hey my girlfriend...oh yah...and her five kids...". he was a postman. Used to take us to the stock Car races at Mt. Pleasant Speedway. How fun was that??? the dirt..kickin up in the air...getting in our eyes, faces, and food. it was GREAT. I remember one lady..(this was a LONG time a planet far far away) She was eating a hamburger at the race track using ONLY her fingernails! They were INCREDIBLY long. She was holding the bun/burger with only her nails. WHOAA, impressed a young girl. Mom divorced Jim. She said..well I already had five kids and he couldn't be first. I always felt a little sorry for him. He was sort of a meek/quiet guy, with a stutter/stammer, and he was no match for my mom.
One other dad I had was Leon. They were married when my mom was preggos with me. His name is on my birth certificate, but he's not my "bio" father. All this came out in of course a weird and wacky way. First time, I was living in North Carolina (USMC OOOHH RAH), and I got a call from her, saying she.."had a new roommate". 'you remember, your dad, Leon". (as they had divorced when I was like 3 or something. Well I just had a melt down. I mean I had NO contact with him ever after he left. I remember one knock down drag out fight, I wandered downstairs and in my mind I saw him hitting her over the head with the telephone. Keep in mind folks, this was not "todays telephone" (sort of like not your daddy's oldsmobile). This was a ROTARY dial on the wall unit. VERY black and very heavy. Years after they got back together, my sister and I were talking to Leon about that night, and he said.."I wasn't hitting HER>>>She was HITTING me.". Oh yah. That's my mom--dainty she ain't.
I went to a private school for 5 years, through 4th grade till it closed. Central Michigan University Lab school. Like 5 student teachers in the morning and 5 more in the afternoon. Very personalized. I always felt like a paraiah..Divorced mom, no dad, none of my brothers or sister had gone was BRUTAL to get into the school. Mom said she put me on a waiting list the week I was born. things go something freeky this way just came..the guy who held my head up for me in my car wreck in 98 just called. more of this later.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

June Days of Paradise

Wow..what a day. GREAT summer day. Dropped William's friend Chris off at 10:30 this morning, came home-packed up...and went to da beach. Thank you Gratiot County for passing the Parks millage.
Picked up Lori's 2 boys, and Ron went with us. He almost didn't as he was given tremendous grief over it from his spouse..(even tho she was LEAVING for the entire day)....
Went down by North Star..SUn, SUN , More sun, water..cooler..hee hee, sandwiches etc. It was so funny..I was down by the water..look up by our picnic table is a girl looking suspiciously like my 5 year old..suit down, taking a whizz. I gave her a LOOK, and she just shrugs..pulls up her suit and comes running back to the water. .."I didn't want to go over to the port a pottys mom.". well WHo can blame her.?
THEN...stayed there till about 5 , took a tour of where Ron grew up in North Star..very cool..looking into his parents house was like looking into a time capsule. The couch..with the brown tufted upholstery and doilies on the arms, his dads shirts still hanging in the closet. I could feel the ghosts there.
NOT one tree on the entire place. Very wierd. Ron said his dad HATED trees. Wow. that is very wierd.
Then..WEnt to Brad and Lori' swam there, we grilled GREAT steaks for Fathers day, ate salads- Lori has this new salad sort of coleslaw with peanut sauce and mandarin oranges. Really good. AND rented a movie.. Will Farrell is a News Desk anchor, (
Stupid..funny, bust a gut in some parts.
OK don't know why the font changed. Then..Brought everyone home tucked 'em in, and went out to the PUB for a couple tonic waters and first time ever to Croc Rocs. Saw a band the drummer set up the sound system in our church- Clarke...Great drummer.
Then home, and now bed.
Very red and sore from having too much fun in the sun.

MOvie Harrison Ford movie FIREWALL

Ok..Gotta say if Harrison is in it (he lets me call him Harry) I have a predispostion for enjoying it. This was good right from the jump. It doesn't get too bogged down in the computer geek stuff, but what is there is believable.
I like the weaknesses Harrison showed. He was a worried family man, yet when the Bad guy made him fire his faithful did it Completly. (but did it for her protection). It was technical enough so that I couldn't think I knew what was coming next. There were many plot twists I didn't get untill viewing it the 2nd time. (intersperse the first time with bathing FILTHY daughter feet, grabbing something to get my "drift"..Oh thats another movie (Tokyo Drift)...another subject!!
Of course,, you CANNOT involve "da man" the cops, they have him prewired that his every move is known.
The Ending..was great, believable and a-typical Harrison. He showed weakness, and true love for his family.
An overall feel good flick.

Friday, June 16, 2006

WOW Hey I learned how to do a Second Post!

Ever have one of those days where just about everything, (but waking up) was just GREAT? Just coulnd't get to sleep last night..had to be somewhere at 11, coffee was Yesterdays, but still better than nothing.
Got to See My Eldest sweet daughter Helena today after she's been Being a visiting bee since like monday. She is INCREDIBLE. She went to Our Friends house Beth on tuesday, then went to Beths daughters house for 2 days to play with her 'cousin'. Got to swim, but most of to be away from her siblings. They did go to Troufant..the huge flea market thing on Thursday. WIlliam was so sweet he bought something for Helena. Some "snappers" know the throw the white puff of paper on the cement and SNAP. It was great fun.
William got some more illegal fireworks...our favorite of this Ball..that HOVERS in the air as you watch it rise from the ground. Then it SPINS..and takes off like a flying saucer. Its great. ALways a crowd pleaser.
SO Got daughter..then hung out with my friend and about 11 BOYS and my two girls. they dont have a lot fo Testosterone yet..but they are BOYS!!...THEN I took all the Boys to THe movie that just came out..TOO FAST TOO FURIOUS---TOKYO DRIFT. It was exactly entertining wiht enough car crashes, and hot babes to be great. I love looking at the backdrop of the movie also..the Graffitti tags were hip....the neon lights...Very GOOD allaround movie. and FOr Fathers day...kid fixes up his dad's stang.
Dunked all the urchins in big pool today..then thenighbor kids were there too..My friend..says she feeds these guys EVERY DAY..they never go home! Like why wouldn't moms know where their kids were for lunch????
We fed em good too...turkey sandwiches, peanut butter uncrustables, pop, chips, cookies, icw cream bars they just kep' on snacking. One kid was in my Youth group at church that has disbanded...he as asking if they are going to start up..I said I had No idea. made me sad.

OK I have more to say..but that is enough meandering for now.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

trying to see if this works

OK first blog..dont even really want to do this but I decided I have too much to say to keep posting on other's blogs. Not that anyone will care or Read this!! Well..I may make the kids read it.